One "Hot Racket"

Guys we have to get in on this. I was at the mall today and I thought I would stop in the sporting goods store to look at some shorts to wear to the gym. I usually like to work out in an old pair of boardshorts or something, but I have not coaxed myself into working out in what is essentially underwear like the Europeans yet. So I figured they may finally have some shorts in the stores since its getting warm, and if I am lucky they will have a pair that are longer than 2-3 inches from the waist to the end of the leg. I saw some boardshorts and thought they would be perfect until I noticed the price, 699-799 DKK. Folks, thats like more than $100-$120 for a pair of shorts.

So I got to thinking, unfortunately...as many of you know we can pick up name brand boardshorts in the US for $30-$50 tops, and we can get Target brand boardshorts for about $15 tops. So I want to get in the importing/exporting business, we will be called "Vandalay Industries." The plan is to buy a couple thousand dollars worth of board shorts and bring them out here in suitcases. We will mix name brand and generic boardshorts. I figure we can mark them up to right around $100 and still undercut our competitors. The generics we can sell for $60-$75 dollars. Everyone knows that a pair of Quicksilver boardshorts is functionally equivalent to "Wham" or "Tubular" boardshorts at 4x the cost.

The only problem I can foresee is that nobody wears boardshorts in Denmark, but I think a good marketing campaign could change that...like any good "free" market where people can "choose" what they want we will con people into thinking they are freely choosing Southern Californian attire. We have precedent for fooling people into buying the surf culture, in about 47 of the 50 states for instance. We can either open up our own little shop and put some crummy dinged up surfboard in the window, or we could just provide them wholesale to other retail stores.

Some may object that I am contributing to spreading the gawdy and valueless culture of Southern California as American hegemony, or just ripping people off to my own advantage. This is not how I see it though...I think of the young Danish lad who has worn out a copy of Endless Summer and spends his nights thinking of barreling waves. I suspect I would be a criminal if I let this child, call him Lars, buy a pair of Quicksilver boardshorts for $120...so what if I get filthy rich in the process and never have to suffer some stupid job.